


If She Says

by Laylah



Category: Shadow Hearts
Genre: F/M, Romance, Xeno
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-13
Updated: 2009-11-13
Packaged: 2017-10-02 15:38:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laylah/pseuds/Laylah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Has she always looked at him like that? Is he seeing things differently now, through Radiance's eyes? "It's all right," she says. "It's almost dawn."</p>
            </blockquote>





	If She Says

It should feel weird, defeating his father. Yuri thinks he should be grieving. But Ben Hyuga is smiling as he sinks to the graveyard earth, and the expression looks peaceful, looks proud.

"Go," he says. "Take this power, and make good use of it."

Light rises around them, and then the full majesty of the Seraphic Radiance unfurls, suffusing Yuri's soul with light in a prism of all colors and no color. It isn't cruel, isn't angry after all, just immense and strange and powerful, and it's -- filling him, changing him, making him more than human. For a moment he thinks he can feel arms around him, smell the crispness of woodsmoke and winter air that clung to his father's coat -- and then he wakes.

"Yuri," Alice says, and first he thinks, wow, she's in my room? But then he thinks, crap, I've worried her. That's her worried voice.

"I'm fine," he says, only his voice comes out strange, chiming and melodic, which startles him enough to make his wings flutter.

Wait, his wings?

Yuri opens his eyes, and for a minute he can't even tell what he's seeing, there's so much light, so much color. Whatever he is right now, it's -- fuck, it's _Radiance_. He sits up, carefully, feeling the way his wings move, fluttering and half-unfolding and there's probably a name for that, but he doesn't know what it is. They take care of themselves pretty good, though, like Ifrit's extra arms or Dragner's tail. Yuri looks down at his hands, and after a second the blur of too-much calms down and he can see how he looks. It's closer to human than most of the others, only pale blue -- weird, when he remembers it being sort of green in Shanghai -- with black patterning across his skin. There's no fur or feathers or anything to hide his -- he looks down. "Shit."

"Are you all right?" Alice asks.

"Fine," Yuri says, but he closes his eyes for a second all the same. He knows he'll be back to normal as soon as he releases the fusion, all pieces present and accounted for, but that doesn't really make it any easier to look down and have his cock be just _not there_. "Wasn't expecting it, is all."

"Is it a new fusion?" Alice asks. "I thought you said you had all of them."

"It's the Seraphic Radiance," Yuri says. "It finally calmed down enough to -- for my dad to -- anyway, I can fuse with it now." He opens his eyes and looks up at her. "Oh my god. you're beautiful."

Alice blushes bright pink and looks down, hiding her smile behind her hands. "Thank you," she says. "What --"

"Sorry," Yuri says. "It's -- it's always true, but -- it feels like I can see so much more, like this." She practically glows, rich with color and faith and hope, so welcoming and warm. "I don't mean to be -- weird, or anything. Did I wake everyone?"

"Not everyone," Alice says. "Zhuzhen woke up when you, ah, when you changed, and he came to get me, since -- after you first fused with the Seraphic Radiance --"

"You were the one who talked me down," Yuri says. "Thanks. I'm sorry I cost you sleep, though."

Alice shakes her head. Has she always looked at him like that? Is he seeing things differently now, through Radiance's eyes? "It's all right," she says. "It's almost dawn."

"Oh." Yuri pushes back the sheet so he can get up, and Alice still squeaks and looks down, even though there's nothing to see right now. "Should we just get an early start on the day, then?" They have a lot of work to do if they're going to stop Albert Simon's stupid god from destroying everything, after all. He takes a deep breath, trying to calm down and relax enough to remember his self, and convince Radiance to let go of his body.

Only then Alice looks up and says, "It's all right. Do you -- do you have to change back right away?"

"Well," Yuri says, "I guess I don't _have_ to --" and then he forgets what else he was going to say because she's reaching out toward him, and the words just disappear when her hand touches his bare chest. "No," he breathes. "I don't have to."

Alice is still blushing, but she takes a step closer to him anyway. "You're -- you're beautiful, too," she says. "Yuri -- I -- I want to --" She looks him in the eyes and he can _see_ what she wants, possibilities, strange images unfolding in his head, and it's -- well, damn. He guesses he should have known a priest's daughter would like the idea of doing this stuff with a god.

Yuri leans down, slow enough that she could pull away or tell him to stop if she decided she didn't want what she wants, but Alice doesn't go anywhere, just tilts her head back and closes her eyes when he kisses her.

Oh, man, he could do this for hours, just fascinated by the taste of her mouth and the softness of her skin and all the colors that wash off her in slow rolling waves -- like a heartbeat, except he can feel her pulse when he cups a hand against her face, and her heart's pounding, way faster than that. She leans into him, and his wings flex, stretch out without him really meaning to do it. They sweep forward, wrap around them both, and his feathers are shimmery black. Alice makes a little surprised noise and reaches up to touch them, gently, stroking in the direction the feathers lie. Yuri moans.

"I'm sorry," Alice says immediately. "Are you all right?"

"Yes," Yuri says. "Please -- please do that again."

Alice nods, reaching up further this time so she can touch the arch of the long bone that gives the wing shape. Yuri doesn't even have words for how that feels, but it makes his breath catch in his throat, makes his wings flutter around her. "Yuri," she says softly, like she's amazed. "I -- I want to --"

He sees her blush this time as a warming of the air around her, and something tastes like jasmine -- there's so much going on that Radiance can sense but Yuri can't make sense of. "Anything you want," he says, but he's still not ready for her to start fumbling with the buttons of her coat. "Oh god," he says. "Yes. Yes please."

He helps her out of her coat, and the blouse under it, and the lacy things under that, and part of him really wishes he had his own body back because he'd be so goddamn hard right now, but he can't bring himself to miss it all that much -- not when the color of her skin is like music, and she smells like joy, and everywhere she touches him is like sunlight. Yuri sinks to the floor and pulls her down into his lap, sweeping his wings around her -- if he just thinks about what he wants them to do and now how to manage it, they work out just fine. She runs her hands up his skin and he lets the long feathers at the edge of his wings brush her back and she shivers, her legs spread to either side of one of his thighs and when she bears down, the fabric there is damp -- god --

"You're wonderful," he tells her softly, breathing in the scent of her hair, catching the curves of her breasts in the palms of his hands. "You're a miracle, Alice. I --" he's not sure he can say it, not sure he wants to say it the first time when he's not himself -- "I'll never leave you," he promises instead, close enough, and she slides her arms around him and holds on tight.

"I'll -- I want to be with you, too," she says, and her hips move just a little, so he lays a hand across the small of her back to encourage her. She moves with him, sliding wet and bright against his thigh, and her hands find the joints where his wings meet his back -- and it feels as though he's -- he's _opening_, right there, unfurling and welcoming and there's light, so much light, peace that sings through his heart --

And the future, laid out before him in a glowing scatter of possibility. World upon world, the ones they save and the ones where they never have the chance -- and there, close to the now-moment, Alice standing brave and alone in the face of some giant mask thing with too many eyes. It lashes out and she staggers, calling out for help, and -- no. He won't let that happen. Yuri pushes his way into that path, follows it back to the point where it could be something else. Those damn masks again -- well, he would have let them live if he was going to be the only one they bothered, but if they're going to make trouble for Alice, all bets are off.

When he comes back to his senses -- it feels like the world collapsing back into itself, shrinking to a single moment, what-is instead of what-could-be -- Alice is watching him, still holding tight. "Yuri?" she says.

"Still me, don't worry," he says, and smiles. Warmth shines around her when he does that, and he thinks maybe it _would_ be okay to tell her how he feels. After this is over. "You going to get embarrassed when I change back?"

Alice looks down, and tries to cover herself with her hands.

"I mean -- don't, okay?" Yuri says. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. You're -- you're wonderful."

"Thank you," Alice says, and kisses him again before she slides out of his lap. He's still not surprised that when he's done changing back -- his body folding inward, magic pouring off him like heat -- she's putting her coat back on. Yuri sits still and watches, content for now that she's willing to let him.

When she's dressed again she smiles at him, blushing a little, but a lot less than he'd have expected. "Should we go get the others now?"

"Pretty soon, yeah," Yuri says. He stands up, stretching to work out the kinks in his back. "Hey, do we still have that cup thing Joshua gave us?"

Threatening Alice, huh? Those damn masks won't even know what hit them, by the time he's through.


End file.
